Most of us know and live by, the understanding that we are made of up energy.

I don’t know about you, but I find that I love to linger in the world of energy because sometimes it just feels gentler and more expansive. At some point along the way, I began to recognize that all the time I was spending in meditation, in more high energy space, the less I was inclined to fully be in my body. The less I was fully present. Sure, my mind could be focused on the here and now, but I managed to disconnect from my body which dulled many aspects of my life.

I have found over the years, in my own personal experience and in observing others, that there are particular patterns of energy that quickly take us away from experiencing life on all levels, mind, body, and spirit.

It is in these patterns that we end up sending parts of ourselves energetically into areas of life that will not serve us and worse, deplete our energy leaving less for us to tap into for our co-creative purposes.

In my experience, three of the top ways that we mismanage soul energy are through:

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You got yourself into this. You get yourself out.”

After years of substance abuse and suffering and living with agoraphobia, one woman finally found the strength to step out and embrace her inner light

It came out of nowhere as I lay in bed, in my usual position, on a cold night in early January of 1998. Had I heard this voice a moment sooner, I would have hidden under my covers. Something was different about this moment somehow, but I couldn’t put my finger on it. I just knew that I suddenly felt different. So different, in fact, that when I woke up the next morning, I drove to my mother’s house.

This was a huge deal because for the past two years, I had been agoraphobic.

For those of you that aren’t familiar, agoraphobia is when you are afraid to leave the house, something I had not done for a long time. But I went to my mother and ended up in a tell-all conversation, sharing all the things that were bubbling up that I had been concealing for the last few years. I said to my mom…

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I was programmed to be strong and unstoppable, to always do my best—sometimes, at any cost.

For years I was known for saying yes when I meant no. I would be so insistent on keeping my promises that I wouldn’t back out of plans, no matter what.

I’ll get that massage when I have more time, I’d say.

I’ll take that vacation when I have more money. 

I didn’t understand that the pressure I was putting on myself wasn’t helping anyone, and was hurting me.

This pattern kept me from indulging in self-care—something I have come to understand is a learned skill.

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“No man ever steps in the same river twice, for it’s not the same river and he’s not the same man,” Greek philosopher, Heraclitus.

 If this is true, and in my experience it is, we need to start having a different conversation around habits. And I don’t just mean so-called “bad” habits. Let me explain.

Habitual behaviors will often give us comfort because of the way they anchor us into what is familiar. We know ourselves, we can anticipate a result and we don’t have to think, we get to relax into the known. As spiritual journeyers, habits can feel like a welcomed reprieve of not having to think or “be” with something. We get a break. But what if our habits are preventing us from actually moving forward? What if our habits are meeting us at the level of needs we had when they were developed and not necessarily who we are right now?

Most of us recognize that we are co-creators in our life experiences but we often focus on the bigger aspects of life. We want to manifest that house, that relationship or that job and in doing this we lose sight of the moment to moment growth opportunities that enable us to become the person we need to be to welcome in the bigger changes in our lives. Why? Because we all engage in habits and without conscious awareness, we solidify former aspects of ourselves and don’t leave room for the ways we change every moment of every day.

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